CM Mingle June 2011 Quad Cities
i have a rare heart disease that my mom died from when she was only 2 years olden than i am now. I think i am going to die in a couple years and i find it hard to believe in god. Both of my wife's parents are pastors and i go to church twice a week out of duty but i dont believe a word. There church is a pentecostal church so they speak in toungs and fall down and stuff. It all seems so fake to me. I think there has to be a god but i don't think it is the one they tell me about in church. I want to believe so i will have no fear in death but i cant. If human beings have been on this planet for 50,000 years then why did god send Jesus just 4,000 years ago. It is facts like that that make me doubt the bible. But i don't thing everything could exist without some sort of god. When i die is it going to be like before i was born. I am searching for answers but cant find any.